So what? V day happened. (On to the next please...)

I am not BITTER about not going out on a good date on Valentine's. (In fact, wait for my book, it’s gonna be hilarious about dating.) This post is not the way to go if you think this is a one-sided sort of post-modern V-Day blogging.  Since the beginning of time, well my time, up to the point of hearing both sides I say this, “Love Everyone.” Not telling you go to on the street and ask for hugs or kisses from the world (there are some nasty cooties out there), but try not to limit your knowledge/capability of caring to one person or special holiday.

A lady I study with, and it seems we are actually similar (she’s me in my mature years of cool life), I think nailed me on the head. She said, “This girl knows no strangers.” And I had to think and clap on that. It got me thinking, “Why IS everyone so freaking afraid of getting to know someone when they have nothing to lose when they did not know that person in the first place?” I mean, is the possibility of never knowing that person intimately (though you never knew them in your LIFE to begin with) because they are not interested in hanging with you ,THAT nerve-wrecking that you won’t get your panties(or boxers) adjusted to just say “Yo, how you doing?” (Thanks Joey Tribiani). If they say ‘no thanks’, just move a long cordially.

(Jay Z “On to The Next” Video) *Dance it out*

Valentine’s Day: Me and some really cool peeps took a bike ride out in the city and did something unexpected for the public and gave out flowers. Some were receptive and others, well I won’t kick their booty today for being a lil boogie. As my pal said, “We should do this as a social experiment…”, I was thinking what is holding someone back from just seeing the openness someone is trying to give and seeing that we are not trying to sell something. That we were just being nice to show the love, pay it forward, or just, as the lady friend said, “Just doing something friggn’ nice for ya!” Stranger danger should hardly be a concern after a certain age (with your good  ol' common sense) and so should your attitude towards other humans expectancy. This whole introvert\extrovert labels should go kaput to a black box island and officially be unknown.

As someone interested in finding that luuuuuuuuuuuuv, but not really ‘pressed’ (90s kids know the term) to get twisted out in these streets, finds just the practicality of getting to know someone. By saying “’Sup’”, can be sufficient to leading to a fun that is unexpected. A way to meet people that you never know can turn around for the best for you just because you kept it simple.

KEY: KEEP IT SIMPLE HUMAN.

And that’s just it, we are all HUMAN. Not everyone is in it for the cookie, or cake, or pie and eat chips with dip too. Until a clear statement, like some recent experiences I have encountered have grossly stated, get out of your head and reach your hand out for a cordial response and not a material or super emotional exchange. My guy/gal friends alike have had a crazy time finding love, getting to know folks in a new place, or just finding that similar weird in someone else (we all got something interesting going on).  All just because we’d forced it or didn’t just see that it is okay to just actually get to say 'hello' to a person first before you invest your entire heart and hard earned cash on someone. I have truly been able to confidently invest my heart, mind, and time in friends, networks, and new random peeps and seeing that everyone should have that pal that does not mind the bravery or simplicity it took to just reach out for a common word amongst humans.

Be positive in what may come out of your random chance for smiling. Try a new hobby, play somewhere with strangers, or just calling that new number (rather than texting) to see what can happen. Your results may not happen right away, but at least you are making SOMETHING HAPPEN. Try something, try it now. There is no harm in showing chill love for someone to know there are others out there willing to try something they have been thinking about doing too.

You may become someone’s story and liven up their world.

Without labels.

As human as not expected.

 

Shindig your Way

I know I know about a lot of events, fun shindigs by friends, and get down and happy with the best of them. Most times though I enjoy being the quiet one at these events and watch/listen to how people interact instead of being the life of the party. Now the whole introvert\extrovert personalities can come into effect of how you place yourself in public settings. But when going to an event that you know people are going to interact and want some kind of attention from you or many how do you keep yourself open but mysterious at the same time?

I say: “Shut. Up.”

2 words that will totally catch the bold and shock the reserved. You can gear up (or down) who is gonna be your cup of tea at your next shindig. Those who react like they are ‘oh so taken aback’ will be your conservatives and low key folks that have that cool conversation with you. Although they may ghost out and you will be left like Cinderella’s shoe on a drunken homecoming night. Speaking of which, when is it cool to ghost out of a party??? 

Check out this story: http://ideas.evite.com/etiquette/is-ghosting-okay/

So don’t get your feelings hurt if these folks run out you like a bad ex-lover. Secondly, lol check this: http://ideas.evite.com/etiquette/the-dos-and-donts-of-seeing-an-ex-at-a-party/ 

Don’t worry you came to the party looking great and now you’re FABULOUS. Strut it and meet that someone new to spark your shindig experience.

So what about those that are like ‘Ha, hell yeah! I know right?!?’ and continue on when you say “Shut. Up.”??? Well, they are gonna take your shindig to another level you may or may not be ready for. In fact, they will keep you close like the conservative ones, but you may lose them in the crowd that will be fawning over them all night. They can be your networking wing-person and your crazy BF at the same time. Be warned though, these may be fast and confusing types of relationships that will leave you scratching your head. You won’t know if y’all are going steady or just a crush playing footsies like your middle school boyfriend/girlfriend at Thanksgiving dinner.

How do I know??? Trust , as a person on both sides of the overactive and mundane spectrums and listening to more than sometimes what I can handle of people telling me their life stories…I have definitely experienced my share of all the above and been the person on the other side. Ask your friends, if you ain’t scared, what they think of you when y’all go out.  Get that inner reflection from a non-biased sort. I love asking off guard to pals and colleagues alike what I am doing to hinder or help a relationship. It is awesome to be able to improve positive in your ways. Or if you like being a rude son of a gun or an overachieving people pleaser, by all means DO YOU. No one should like you more than you.

There is so much that you can learn about yourself and others if YOU just shut up. So do it. Shut. Up. (I mean that in the nicest way)

Adventure on.

JB